Seven Ways to Tell Mr. Furley That You Don’t Have the Rent Money This Month


Mr. Furley is so much more than a cool-looking guy who wears scarves and has what looks like a poodle on his head. He’s also a landlord who takes his job very seriously. If Mr. Furley doesn’t collect the rent on time, his brother Bart will be distraught. As you can imagine, Jack, Chrissy, and Janet need to pay their rent on time.

What happens if you can’t pay Mr. Furley your rent when you owe it? Don’t sweat it; we’ve got you covered with these seven ways you can get out of paying your rent with Mr. Furley.

1. Tell Mr. Furley your dog ate the money

Will it work? Probably not. However, it’s better than telling Mr. Furley that you blew all your money on lottery tickets and Hi-C Flashin’ Fruit Punch. You can also tell Mr. Furley that the dog locked himself in the car and when your uncle Phil’s friend comes to get him out, he will put his hands thru the window and grab all your money. Maybe then Mr. Furley will believe you and set up a time for you to pay him back.

2. Pretend you’re a robot

Robots don’t have to pay rent because the government says so. This will be tough going since you’ll have to pretend to have a robotic voice, but it’s worth a shot. Tell Mr. Furley that if he doesn’t believe you, he can watch you use your robotic voice on the phone to call the robot company. Sounds good, right?

3. Tell Mr. Furley you had a seizure

This is always a great idea. All you have to do is tell Mr. Furley that you had a seizure, and it’s imperative that you lay down for six to eight hours. After that, he’ll probably believe you and will send someone to let you out of your house.

4. Say someone stole your money while you were drinking at the Regal Beagle

Tell Mr. Furley that you were drinking at the Regal Beagle with your friends, and you had all your money in your pocket. The last thing you remember is ordering a drink, and the next thing you know, all your money was gone.

5. Pretend you’re moving

If you want to be like Chrissy and her dad, this is the perfect way to tell Mr. Furley that you don’t have the rent money. Just tell him you are moving at the end of the month and have decided to live in a tent. Most landlords will let you out of your lease if you’re moving.

6. Give Mr. Furley a big fat fake check

A big fat fake check will always work. Just write the number 1,000,000 on a piece of paper and tell Mr. Furley that you are paying him one million dollars. He’ll probably believe you.

7. Ask Lana to go out on a date with Mr. Furley

The hope here is that Lana Shields can make Mr. Furley forget all about the rent money you owe. Just ask her to go out with him, and you’ll practically be off the hook. She’s the only person who can make Mr. Furley forget about money.

Conclusion

Mr. Furley is a tough guy with a tough job to do. If you can’t afford to pay your rent and he’s threatening to kick you out of your house, try using one of these tactics. You can thank me later.

Michael

I'm a human being. Usually hungry. I don't have lice.

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