How to Convince Your Stepfather to Become an Alcoholic


There’s nothing better than having an alcoholic stepfather. You can always count on them to be there for you when you need a drink, and they’re always up for a party. But how do you convince your stepfather to become an alcoholic?

Establish common ground by finding shared interests

Before you can begin to convince your stepdad to become an alcoholic, it’s important to understand him. What does he like? Does he have any hobbies? Do you share any interests or activities that you could bond over? If not, what is he good at? What is he terrible at?

Once you’ve established common ground between yourself and your stepfather, you’re ready for the next step: engaging him in conversation.

Compliment him on his drinking achievements, no matter how small

Complimenting him on his drinking achievements (no matter how small) may seem like a strange way to encourage your stepfather’s alcoholism, but it can actually help him feel supported. Maintain enthusiasm and positivity—but avoid going overboard. Don’t say something you don’t mean just to get him to drink more. If you think your stepfather has had too much to drink, be honest and tell him so. If he wants someone to give him an excuse to drink, then by all means…just don’t be that person!

It’s important that you aren’t only recognizing when he goes above and beyond with his drinking habits. Complimenting his other accomplishments shows that you care about the whole person and not just their ability to hold their liquor better than anyone else in the family (though we’re sure he does).

Let him know that you think he’s a great stepdad

  • Be sincere. Coming across as fake or insincere may have the opposite effect than you intend. Ask yourself if you really think that he is a good step-father before saying anything at all.
  • Use an appropriate tone of voice. If you’re trying to be friendly and sweet, but come off sarcastic or insincere, he may not take your compliment seriously.
  • Avoid flattery. He’ll see right through it and be annoyed with your attempts to butter him up.
  • Be specific when possible. Saying “you’re the best step-dad in the world!” can seem more like a line than a genuine compliment since it’s so vague (and kind of generic). Instead, try something like “I’m really impressed by how much time you spend with my little sister.” Do: “You have great instincts about what makes kids laugh,” Don’t: “You’re just so hilarious.”

When in doubt, err on the side of caution. Too many compliments at once can be overwhelming for some people or make them feel suspicious that you’re trying to get something from them.

Give him lots of positive reinforcement

It’s important that you are assertive and positive when it comes to your stepfather’s alcohol consumption. Praise him for his efforts! Encourage him to keep going! Praise him when he’s doing well!

If he has a good day, give him a pat on the back. If he makes it through the whole day without having a drink, give him a high five. If he can go two days without drinking, give him a hug and kiss.

Be supportive and understanding when he’s going through a tough time

If you truly want your stepfather to become an alcoholic, then the best thing you can do is not take it personally. If you come at him and argue, he’ll only hold his ground and tell you that you’re wrong or don’t understand. This will make him feel antagonized, which will make him double down on his not drinking. Instead, stay calm and be sympathetic about your stepfather’s situation.

The second thing to remember is that if your stepfather is drinking alcoholically because of a personal problem, like a breakup or the death of his mother’s parrot, it’s important not to take his bad behavior personally. Even though there may be times when he acts in a way that makes you think he doesn’t care about anyone else besides himself—like if he loses it one day after losing all of his money gambling online—don’t assume this means he doesn’t love you anymore. He just needs some time to work through things with alcohol being his form of therapy in the interim period before professional help is sought out.

Conclusion

If you want your stepfather to become an alcoholic, the best thing you can do is be supportive and understanding. Compliment his drinking habits, give him positive reinforcement, and be understanding when he’s going through a tough time. Most importantly, don’t take his drinking habits personally. If you can do all of these things, then you’ll be well on your way to convincing your stepfather to become an alcoholic. Good luck!

Michael

I'm a human being. Usually hungry. I don't have lice.

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